Renowned Jewish philosopher and theologian Abraham Joshua Heschel wrote intelligently about spirituality and human nature. One of his most important realizations is that self-respect is something we develop over time via our decisions and behaviors rather than something we are born with.

Heschel thought that developing self-esteem required discipline. According to him, it's a process where one learns to put long-term objectives and values ahead of short-term gratification or ephemeral desires. Saying "no" to oneself in the face of distractions or temptations is a crucial habit for personal development.

Think of your life as a garden where deliberate decisions are made every day to sow the seeds of discipline. You're sowing these seeds every time you choose not to give in to sloth, procrastination, or negative habits. This endeavor eventually grows into a strong plant that produces the benefits of self-respect. This fruit symbolizes an inner sense of self-worth and assurance in one's capacity for sensible decision-making.

Heschel also noted that our sense of dignity increases in tandem with our level of discipline. Dignity comes from a deep-seated conviction in the value of self-control and integrity rather than from seeking approval or recognition from others. Every time you push past your limits, you feel stronger and more capable, much like when you regularly exercise to build up your muscles.

Heschel's main point is that self-respect is a skill that is developed over years of deliberate effort and disciplined living rather than something we pick up quickly or inherit from our parents. People can develop a lasting sense of dignity within themselves by continuously making the decision to act morally even when it is difficult.