American novelist Gillian Flynn, who is renowned for her compelling stories, once made a moving observation regarding the difficulties of female identity and social expectations. She discussed how women frequently find themselves in circumstances where they feel pressured to play roles that are expected of them and please men in one of her interviews.

According to Flynn, this phenomenon is the desire to be viewed as the "Cool Girl," a person who is naturally charming and flexible and who constantly attends to the needs of others without taking into account their own. This idea is comparable to a chameleon, which is always changing its appearance to suit various settings but never really being itself.

While seeking acceptance or wanting to please others is perfectly acceptable, the author points out that it becomes problematic when this desire degenerates into self-deprecation and the repression of one's actual desires. Women risk losing touch with their true selves when they go to great measures to be viewed as desirable by men—doing things they wouldn't normally do just to satisfy someone else's expectations.

This observation emphasizes the conflict between social pressures and personal authenticity, particularly for women negotiating relationships and social dynamics. Flynn's observation serves as a reminder of the value of remaining loyal to oneself while simultaneously acknowledging the nuanced forces that can affect our decisions and actions when we seek love or approval.