Quotes Meaning

"Don’t flatter yourselves that friendship authorizes you to say disagreeable things to your intimates. On the contrary, the nearer you come into relation with a person, the more necessary do tact and courtesy become."

- Oliver Wendell Holmes, Sr.

The 19th-century American author, poet, and doctor Oliver Wendell Holmes, Sr. is renowned for his perceptive observations on a range of life topics. The delicate balance between friendships and honesty is one of his noteworthy concepts. True friendship, in Holmes' opinion, does not grant you the right to be direct or severe with those who are close to you.

Think of friendship as a garden in which each word you say is a seed. These seeds require extra attention to develop into strong plants when your relationships are close. Saying hurtful things can cause the harmony and beauty of the garden to be disrupted, much like planting weeds. Holmes contends that using tact and courtesy—qualities that support and preserve the relationship—becomes even more important as friendships grow.

Holmes' theory emphasizes that although honesty is crucial in relationships, it should always be weighed against consideration and kindness. In order to prevent their words from destroying the relationship they have worked so hard to create, he counsels friends to consider their words before speaking. In the same way that a well-kept garden can flourish, friendships can flourish with this methodical approach.

Although Holmes was renowned for his witty and elegant prose, he also recognized the importance of tact in interpersonal relationships. His thoughts on friendship serve as a reminder that, when we are close to someone, showing kindness and respect is just as crucial as telling the truth.

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